carnet – Les dernières mises à jour de mon site.

Allo! Ce blog est intitulé “les dernières mises à jour de mon site” parce que à la base, je voulais juste mettre ici des liens vers les parties de mon site que j’aurais updaté…. pis j’ai commencé à l’utiliser comme un vrai blog.

Mais le blog est jamais comme je veux. La mise en page, je veux dire. Ça marche très bien sur mobile, mais la mise en page sur desktop est nulle. Les images sont jamais pleine largeur. J’ai essayé plein de fois de régler ça, en bidouillant dans le CSS, en essayant de changer de skin, en demandant de l’aide à chatGPT… mais mes connaissances en wordpress sont trop nulles et ya rien qui a marché. Pas capable, par exemple, d’afficher les images de mon carnet d’halifax en pleine largeur, faque ça a juste l’air trop petit et on voit rien. J’ai pensé à faire des thumbnails cliquables, mais ça rend la tâche trop lourde – mais SURTOUT, ça me détourne de mon projet d’origine, qui était de faire un site web qui répertorie tout, tout, tout ce que j’ai fait dans ma vie. Si je commence à poster ici et à poster sur mon site, ça fait un doublon inutile. Pis souvent, j’update le blog et j’oublie d’updater le site. Pas bon!

Faque… je me suis dit que je pourrais un peu transformer la chose. Tout ce qui est image et media, je vais l’uploader directement dans le répertoire approprié de mon site web, et je ne vais mettre à jour ce blog que pour linker les mises à jour. Peut-être aussi quelques fois écrire des textes. Par exemple, j’aimerais beaucoup garder une trace du processus de création entourant Pervitine. C’est un projet tellement gros, et il se passe tellement d’affaires! Des fois je suis moi-même perdue dans mes notes.

FAQUE OUIN je viens de créer un dossier “carnet halifax”, j’ai scanné l’entièreté de ce que j’ai dessiné à Halifax. Il y a les quelques dessins d’observation (un peu poches) que j’ai posté ici, mais il y a surtout de la recherche pour les costumes des personnages de Pervitine. Des idées de mise en scène, aussi. Le carnet, je l’ai acheté là-bas, et il reste plein de feuilles blanches dedans. Je vais continuer à dessiner dedans, et au fur et à mesure que les pages se rempliront, j’irai updater le dossier “carnet halifax” – et j’indiquerai ici que j’ai fait une mise à jour.

C’EST ICI LES CROQUIS

Hello.

I tried to change my name.

I was Zviane. I’ve been doing comics for 20 years now, in montreal/Quebec/canada.

A few years a go, I thought of changing my name. I thought about it during covid. It would coincide with my “career change” – as in, from now on, I’m working more seriously and more exclusively on films rather than comics.

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“Zviane” is kinda wellknown here, in quebec’s comic scene. I mean, in my niche.

When I walk in MCAF now, I sometimes have the feeling that everyone there knows who I am. I feel the eyes on me (it’s Zviane!) – most of the time it’s in my head, but sometimes it is really present. People have high expectations, and I don’t fulfill them. Sometimes I feel trapped in this popularity.

I missed being anonymous. Life is more light when I feel less looked upon.
I try very hard not to be self-conscious. So, as I changed career, changing my name was something to try.

I started sending my work in film festivals under the name BADMINTON PLUS.

(that too appeared to be an interesting experiment. Silly pseudonyms happen a lot on the comic scene, not that much on the film scene)

“Ooooh but… if I change zviane.com for badminton.plus, TONS of links will be broken in my website!…”

“and… changing my old email “zviane@gmail.com” to something else?? No way!….”

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I sold a painting once, to a girl. I signed my work “badminton plus” (not knowing it would someone else’s possession) and I heard later that the girl was really disappointed that it was not signed “zviane”.

It also happened that I was contacted to participate in a collective book. A honestly paid gig (this is rare). The invitation email was dotted with flowers.

But when I asked if i could sign my contribution “badminton plus” instead of “zviane”… The sender didn’t actually say a direct “no”…. he said:

“En toute franchise, tu es un pilier de la BDQ, alors c’est certain que nous serions déçus de te compter parmi nous sans que ton nom ne figure au sommaire, au «générique».”

(to be frank, you’re a pillar of the Quebec comic scene [flowers], of course we would be disappointed to see you with us without your name in the credits.)

So…… I declined.

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It is normal that zviane still exists. My “zviane” work is still alive, even if I don’t publish books anymore.

But I KNOW very deep in my heart that if I just keep using Badminton Plus and presenting myself with this name, and If I stick to it for more then 20 years, people will eventually switch.

I started hanging out with film people a bit more. People who never knew me when I was zviane, so they didn’t have the habit.

Now they call me “Bad”.
The habit started its cruise.

But now when signing books, returning on my old territory, I’m confused. I sign both name….

I give them what they want, while still pushing, maybe?????

I didn’t sign even La jungle. There is no name on this work.
Shouldn’t I try to prove my point, stick to Badminton, completely abandon zviane and hope people will let go?

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But some people might never switch!!!!
The ones who knew me with the name Zviane, for them I will be zviane FOREVER
They’re like the ones who don’t want to accept the new pronouns, or the inclusive way of writing –
i’m the same! i don’t like it! i don’t like imposed language!

and I don’t want to let go what i love.

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Zviane can’t be a dead name, she’s alive.
Zviane has her Wikipedia page
Where Badminton Plus is not even mentioned.

(oooh how many times did I saw summarized version of my wikipedia page as my bio in an event. There are very irrelevant details, and some major stuff is missing. It makes me feel weird.)

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I cannot

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I cannot get rid of Zviane!
That’s impossible!!

I feel the
RESISTANCE

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The older I get, the more I try to…
you know…

…to embrace chaos.

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And… what’s the importance of a name?

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I will be signing at Pow Pow’s stand (A11) on friday (today!) from 5pm to 6:30pm.
I will have my own table in the OFF all week-end, from 11am to 6pm. This will be held in the Bistrot de Paris, on St-Denis near Mont-Royal.

I have new stuff!!!

I have a very expensive, self-published, 576 full color hardcover book: